Object is such a bad name because no one agrees with what it means.
To me, object and actor are pretty much the same thing. An independent black-box you can send messages to and it responds to them.
The only thing the actor model defines is that you don’t “own” an actor, but instead query it through a “mailing address”, but this is just semantics. A memory pointer works as address as well.
In short, the Alan Kay model of objects is undistinguishable from actors. This is the only model of objects worth discussing, IMO, not the half-baked ideas seen in C++ or Java or other mainstream languages.